Live my dream

Today, is a day of my 1st achievement, so a thought comes in my mind that I should write and let others know how a small dream looking like that it's getting true... Yes, I love to do acting and making short films with my friends. On this auspicious day, I won the 1st prize in a film festival held in a girl’s college ICG, Jaipur (IIS University). It was a good experience as I participated in such a festival first time in my life and God made me wins that competition. I think my luck is too good at times. I must tell u guys that I m not good at writing but my English is good enough to write. I always doubt myself, can I do it or not, or maybe every nerd like me think so. If u talk to me in English than my vocabulary is not that good but if I chat with someone they can`t believe that I am the Praveen Bhajanka who can`t even pronounce difficult words and he is writing like this. I am writing this blog just for fun but I think it’s good to write because it helps you to express yourself. I am writing this as I am writing in my personal diary, you will also think that I am a crazy guy but I love technology but want to get attached to it every time. I am very social too. I am on Facebook, Twitter and in goggle+ also. Right now I am seeking an internship as my course is going to end. Oops…sorry guys I didn’t tell you what I am studying, I am studying at Amity University, mass communication and it's going to end in just one week. When I came to Amity I don’t want to leave my home and not even planned to do it but I thought it’s a good opportunity for me to get admission in this big university. When I came here I didn’t think whom I am going to met and will I be able to stay alone in a hostel or will I be able to manage with my roommate? But slowly I got adjusted in that environment and really that’s too awesome, awake till late night and do fun with no restrictions. No burden and enjoyed my hostel life and then I take a wrong decision but when I am in the hostel I thought, out will be more fun but it’s not at all true. For 6 months it's fun for me to stay outside in city but after that, I started missing my hostel days that how my friends came into my room and watched many movies together with a laptop on and lights off like sitting in a theatre, my university is 40kms far from the city. At times I also think if I am not staying outside I might not be able to see the wonderful Jaipur city and its wonderful kind people`s living in it. At that time I am not able to make my own decisions, I always take suggestions and also go with the suggestions, never thought from my point of view that what I want but see what is wrong or right. I become very judgmental and think 100 times to make a decision because I don’t trust myself. I believe that I am wrong and someone elder to me is right. What bullshit my thoughts are at that time, I missed out many things because I didn’t think for me, I always want to do right things so ask for suggestions…Haha. Now I regret myself very much but my friend said “Better late than never” and from 3 February 2013 onwards I am 21, so I have to make very big decisions of my life, what I have to do in my coming lifetime and which path I am choosing is right or not, am I going in that field only my seeing the finished good or should I see in deep also to have a watch on the consequences that may occur. I think a lot and it becomes sometimes my weakness. You should not think that much that in the end, you will regret like me. Just think once ok? What is going to be wrong and what is going to be right if I do it, that’s all. But I always think the negative aspect first and never do the things which I wanted desperately to do it from the bottom of my heart. I always wanted to do things like my strange fellows which I am doing now and living my life to the fullest. But I must say I didn’t learn anything from Amity but it let me learn how to live life and what type of persons you are going to meet in your life, it also made me somewhat extrovert than what I am before(introvert). I met with different people with different attitudes like my roommate is a good person and teaches me a lot at that time when I am in the hostel. I made a bunch of good friends in the hostel also which are not from my course. Actually now I love expressing myself and I need to be open to face the real world. The world which is outside is waiting for me and gave me as many paths I can afford to walk on it. Nowadays I am seeking an internship in the production house. Honestly, I want to tell you something guys that I don’t know much about the film industry but I always wanted to be a part of it and show something interesting to the whole world through films. I still not decided what I am going to be in my future. I think in every direction so that I don’t leave out anything. I didn’t even decide what to do after my graduation has completed, do the job or further studies but in this thing I love my parents support, they don’t force me even a single time while choosing my course. This question always comes in my mind what to do and what not to do, to make my future bright and successful.